I Invented The Rice Cake.

Watching the food network has lulled me into thinking that great cooks can simply toss things into a mix and with a pinch of this and that turn out a company dish. So I figured I could make a chicken and black bean burrito without consulting a cookbook, for crying out loud.

I had already cooked the chicken and I was using black beans from a can. I decided to add brown rice to add another nuance. I only needed one serving; the box told me 1/2 cup both water and rice in a bowl, microwave for 7 minutes.

I added chopped tomatoes and green onions to the black beans and chicken and I threw in some cumin. By that time, the microwave had signaled that the rice was ready.

Oh, yeah — it was. I had invented the rice cake. Not an atom of water remained, the rice lifted from the bottom of the bowl in one piece. I thought to myself, what would Julia do? Cook rice on the stove, probably.

I crumbled the rice cake into the main mixture. I figured the taste would be the delicious crunchy/soft sensation you get when you wrap a hard shell taco with a soft shell tortilla.  (Visit Taco Bell, if you don’t know what I mean.) A little cheese and everything was wrapped up tight in a whole wheat tortilla for one last microwave jolt.

I won’t make those again. The rice tasted raw, hard and tasteless. The onions really needed to toned down with a little pre saute. And the cumin was frankly worthless. Sig said he was full after the first one.