Rant in Minor

This is simply annoying: Martha Stewart’s advice to copy a hotel technique to remember to flip mattresses 4 times a year to preserve their lives (the mattresses, not the employees).

So you make two tags, one says January and April (which is upside down) which you pin carefully to the top end of the mattress; the other says October and July (which like April is upside down) and yes, pin that to the foot end of the mattress.

Are you still with me? I know, there is NOTHING WORSE than Martha Stewart’s extraordinary anal instructions: January is printed upside, April down, October is printed upside, July is down. I feel I am a marsh-mellow head.

And then the cheery finish. Every January, April, October and July, just make sure that it’s That month that is on Top of the Foot of the bed. (As if this action alone ranks close to finding a Cure for Cancer.)

Despite my disdain, if my mother was still alive, I’d report this tip to her and she would say,  “What a great idea, would you do that for me the next time you visit?” And I would hear myself saying, “Sure, no problem.”

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