Looks like everyone likely to eat pork have signed on. The pork people aren’t looking for new customers; they are going to get pork-lovers to eat more. They changed their slogan, Pork, The Other White Meat, to Pork Be Inspired.

Frankly I don’t have high hopes for the campaign.

If you ask me I think the pork people should do what the prune people did. When they found out prunes brought to mind constipated old people, they changed the name.  No less than the US Food and Drug Administration told the prune people, “Yes, you can call yourself dried plum people.”

So why not just rename pork? Call it … dinner. What’s for dinner, mom? Well, dinner is for dinner, son. Oh, yay, yay says son.   

While they’re at it, pork people need to own a holiday. Candy people sell 2 billion dollars worth on Halloween. Set up a meeting with the Santa Claus people before the dried plum people get around to it. Let it leak that the cookies and carrots thing is so over. Make Santa happy with a side of bacon, a nice pork medallion or ham’n beans.  

Well what do you know, I just became inspired by pork.